For all of you across the world, I wish you the happiest of moments on this advent eve.
Here at THM we deal with some pretty raw feelings of loss and love gone wrong, broken hearts and people cast aside like a dirty rag in the street. I understand your pain and how that can make you feel less than human. I had a person like that in my life not to long ago…..so, let me take this moment to send to you personally my absolute certainty that 2012 is your year to shine. No matter what has happened, no matter who or where you are, there is love for you in the universe. It’s a love that has proceeded each of us in birth, and follows us long after death; it brought you this far and will see you through.
You are not created of your circumstances or your past.
You are a unique soul with all the potential and passion you need to be what you dream of.
No person except you defines who you are.
No person has the right to makes you less than.
No person can determine your fate, your gifts, your worth.
I have this great new theme song from the X Factor judge Nicole S. that I anxiously await on MP3…here is the video.
Just in case that YouTube link isn’t working, you can watch the video to “Pretty” here. I hope it encourages you as it does me to be the person that you are. This is your first mantra for the upcoming new year….
No matter the circumstance, you are still the beloved.
You are beautiful.
You are worthwhile.
You are unique.
You are loved.
It’s Christmas here in Indiana, and I am surrounded by my loving family and all the excitement of Santa and presents, movies and popcorn. I am truly, honestly and fully happy. My cup runeth over. How are you this day? Are you moving to fast to feel the life around you, caught up in the merchandise details? Breathe deeply, and let the rush of the world lay aside. Feel your presence in the universe. Whatever your happy thought, I am here pulling for you this year. I hope that your Christmas eve is amazing, and that your cup of life is filled to the brim with peace and grace. Let me know how it’s going.
You might ask…how does it go from darkness to light? One step in front of the last, focus on what is truly important to you as a person. Those trappings of life, like the multimillion dollar bank account, the house in the Hamptons, the corporate job where your on the glossy cover of the trades? They’re just illusions. They don’t buy happiness. Oddly, I found that when I stopped chasing happiness….it came and found me. It’s not in how much money you make, how many i-do-dads you own from the electronics store, or even an amazing round of golf at the Old Course – it’s in the time you spend giving of yourself to a worthwhile cause that speaks to your gifts, to the love that you give a child or elderly parent, to helping a neighbor in need. Happiness is found in giving.
I’ve thought a lot about love and loss in the past few weeks as we’ve said goodbye to my life long hero and former father in law Pete Driver. Knowing that the world is down by one honest to God hero makes me sad. I’ve been so proud of my daughters in their fierce love for my good friend and former husband, Kent. It’s an honor to be part of the Driver clan, even one step removed. As a mom, I couldn’t love my girls anymore, or be more proud of the amazing women that they’ve become.
And then…there is Brian Rodgers, the love of my life and my very best friend. I can’t tell you how much he means to me. I am looking forward to every day of the rest of my life with this man. Like many of you, in the past I have been on the receiving end of one of those one sided relationships where you are getting the emotional baseball bat to the head, making me question all that I am, all that I’ve ever been….Brian is the total contrast who stands strong, stable, real and whole.
In a world of guys…he’s a man.
He’s the reason that I know real love is out there when you’re ready to find it.
I promise you that if you will get to know who you are and be well in your own skin…real love will find you, in the right time, the right place. Maybe that is tomorrow…maybe it’s next year or even a decade from now. Hold out for the real stuff. No matter how pretty the package, no matter the cost, the love of an honestly self destructive person is not worth surviving. You deserve more. You deserve happiness.
Break gloriously free of the memories that bind you and fly to those heights that await you. For me…I don’t have to just be pretty, sexy or the smartest girl in the room…Brian wants me to be whole, happy and well.
Can I be all that and more?
Yes.
Why?
I understand the greatest gift.
I find God’s greatest love and devotion in his trust. Nietzsche once said that to have faith is to fail in truth…and he couldn’t have gotten more wrong.
Whatever you call God, wherever and whoever you are…I leave you with this thought. It doesn’t matter if you trust in your life, your soul, your love or even yourself yet. He trusts in you, believes in you first.
And that, my friend is the greatest gift of all.
Hope in the darkness that you’re going to find your way….and life is going to be a beautiful journey with lots of hard stuff and rough patches.
It is sooooooo worth it.
Welcome to the human race.
I’ve gotta run…my family is starting the movie without me. Love to you, now and always.
And….Merry Christmas.